midwest thunderstorm: heart eruptions....

September 07, 2003

heart eruptions....

how does this happen?

just when you think you've only got one thing to worry about, one thing to concern yourself with, your life explodes and you're in a new city and there's newness all around you and all you want to do is move home and get a waitressing job

what's going on?

i'm in DC. turned up at my house, my father road-raging at the crazy DC drivers in Friday night rush hour (my father's a country boy; HATES cities) drive up to my apartment in what seems to be a crazy sketchy neighborhood.

my dad says " you're paying 1200 to live in THIS SHITHOLE?!"

thanks. he's retracted the statement, sort of, but it certainly wasn't a vote of confidence.

in actuality, the apartment, and the area, are fine. not ideal, but fine, and laura and i are slowly making our place in the world together.

i, on the other hand....
money is ruling my heart, and my heart has other matters to attend to. two broken hearts on my hands and neither of them my own. and i can only hold one

but not now

tomorrow. i have a plan. to busk. to look for a job. to talk to a landlord. to learn about DC. to join a dance class. to get a bank account. to learn to play guitar. to make it in the music business. to try out for a play. to make a good meal. to live with ease, power, and gentleness.

gentle power.

i'm not there yet.

mr. ashworht had an experience with a teacher of ours from NTI. chris was upset or stressed after an experience with a Balinese Mask session and Per Brahe came up to him and placed one hand on his chest, one on his back, and moved both hands in a circular motions, asking chris to imagine "green hands."

please everyone. i know you are all taking care of me. you don't know it. just send me some green hands and i will find them when i need them.

megs

ps: per brahe, my balinese mask teacher, is in fact the Great Great Great Great grand nephew (I think) of Tycho Brahe, the famous Danish astronomer from Galileo's time. just a note. who says fame is fleeting?

Posted by at September 7, 2003 05:17 PM

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Amy of the Meek household is in DC. You should look her up.

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