you know what...
my boyfriend. is. amazing.
just thought you all should know. he talked me through a long late night crisis. i am going to bed. i am tired. i worked 18 hours yesterday. it is the most intense job ever. its incredibly rewarding. i am exhausted. the fact, however, remains...
my boyfriend. is. amazing.
love you all. talk to you soon...
p.s.: anyone willing to take over the apartment search?
web-logs are weird.
gratuitous.
updates.
the orientation is soon coming to a close. i still haven't opened a bank account. and i can't find an apartment.
ack.
things are revving up here at explo. orientation has been dragging on, but i've got the night off tomorrow night, and i'm gonna cook something before the kiddies get here. i'm knackered already. but feeling good, feeling like i'm passionate about something again, and full of possibility. the mood here is still chill; we have a more mellow group i guess than years past, but i did get to spend the day doing a role play about two girls talking about another girl's "boobies." i mean really, what's funnier?
its true. the humor has turned to 8th grade already. i'm just trying to be prepared. more later.....
back at explo. scary scary scary..
i'm with the intermediate program now, which means in a matter of days i will be surrounded by almost a thousand 8th and 9th graders. i am acting as a residence director, which means i'm in charge of 7 living groups and their RA's, not to mention their loverly parents.... though some, often enough, could be a bit high maintenance... i'm excited and nervous. the dean's office staff is amazing, and i've spent about 4 hours painting the front wall of our office a brilliant orange.
its nice returning to this. i'm surrounded constantly by teachers, teachers who are passionate and talented and rational concerning their craft. it is inspiring. it makes me feel as though teaching is certainly part of my life i want to return to. there's this large part that keeps saying "c'mon, high school choir teacher, how fun would THAT be?"
pretty fricking fun.
left my love in chicago a few days ago. we will probably not see each other again until we move into our apartment in Boston in September. sometimes, this is more than i can bear. but often enough, i realize that the goodbye's are over.
i am missing my lovelies in DC, zsa and laura and jo-than and all our dancer friends... i am missing dancing. but my life is with my work right now, and that, feels so good. so refreshing. that my every day activities are so consuming, and i care so much about them. it makes life full again.
i'm going to make many mistakes this summer. i'm so excited to be LEARNING again. to be growing and scared and full of possibility. love. it.
stay tuned. i'm gonna be better about this this summer.
yes, its true, its me...
i've slacked. i've glowered. i've sulked. i've cocooned and now i'm ready to rejoin the world of the living.
update: i'm in northern-most minnesota, where all the roads are dirt and mosquitoes scare the hell out of you. its true. i've been getting jobs, quitting jobs, being broke, taking buses, taking planes, being ill, being thrilled, being rained out of campsites, taking first steps, searching for apartments, and getting ready.... they're all future months of getting ready....
i'm staying up north for a few more days then heading home to chicago for a brief, final stint with the man in my life, before heading out on my greatest adventure yet: 7 weeks of residential bliss with 600 8th and 9th graders. oh pray for me, brothers and sisters, because the time has not yet come that I will be tested.
i'm gonna be better about this blog. i'm going to reflect, despite the harried pace of my life, and give up some sleep in the process, but sleep can SUCK IT!
yeah.
things are still floating through my mind. things that folks in their mid-twenties are always thinking about. where is my life going? should i be a teacher? do i want to go back to school? do i want to suck it up and be poor for a decade while struggling to find my life in the arts? what about kids? what about a pension? what about providing for myself, for my possibly future children? what about just leaving town?
its all still floating around. my dad didn't figure out his career until he was in his mid-thirties.... that leaves me a decade to beat my dad, which is really the most important thing in life anyway, right?
dad and i have started writing letters. we've always butted heads, of course because we are so similar, but we've cleared up some things, and he's been more honest and generous with me than i've ever thought he might. so way to go, dad! two ponies!!
its time. its beautiful here, and mom and i are going hiking. you know, to contrast all the eating and sleeping i've been doing while in the northwoods.
there'll be more soon, but not too soon. friday, an update, and a new farewell. until then folks... keep kickin' Bush while he's down...